Music is well said to be the speech of angels.

(Thomas Carlyle).

This post is going to be mainly taken from my personal notebook, which I carry around with me most of the time. To preface: I spent the week in Utah, visiting friends and my little sister, and for the most part being afforded the opportunity to ponder in a different setting than the unpleasantly hot Southern California. Naturally, being somewhat of an eclectic individual, I brought along my trombone, as if he were my companion and we were going on an exclusive getaway to the charmingly adventurous Provo scene... which pretty much meant that I couldn't stand the thought of not practicing for a week & it gave me something to do while everyone else was in class or work. I was fortunate to observe one and a half marching band rehearsals during my stay, both of which left me with a feeling reminiscent of attending a wedding of an ex-boyfriend... I mean, just having the irrepressible sentiment that I could have been there at that time, playing along as if my life as of 2008 hadn't even occurred... So, with that in mind, here it is from my musings while on the plane from SLC to Las Vegas:

" While praying just now, I was expressing gratitude that I've been able to practice & improve on trombone. It made me think of having a conversation with a dear friend-- one who will always be there as long as you come to them. & I realized that it's like prayer. My relationship with my trombone is very much like my relationship with God. The closeness of both is entirely contingent upon my willingness to act & seek. I have to put forth the effort to get to know how it works, how He has instructed me to live. He will always be there for me, willing to work with me to the extent that I do things in the proper order/manner. Just as Philip will always be there for me to take joy in... Also, a trombone is not something that you hide in a closet, away from the world, but rather something that you share openly with all you meet... I have always delighted in being able to share my music, & to participate with other trombonists in this feat. & with such hectic lifestyles & schedules, if you want to improve your relationship with God or bone, you have to make that time. They are beautiful relationships which can only be maintained by constantly engaging with them, or things that would strengthen those bonds (like service, or long tones). You can't expect to neglect your trombone for 4 months & still have the same sound on coming back as you had leaving. The same is true regarding H.F.-- you can't neglect your testimony, or stop praying/scripture study & expect to have your faith be as strong as it would have been had you continued on in those things.

"Faith requires trials-- events which stretch our pre-conceived boundaries of ourselves. You could be playing relatively well in your groups, & then find out that you're going to be section leader, or trombone 1A of the men's pep band, & all of a sudden be overcome with the enormous pressure of living up to those positions. The habits of playing, practicing, & behaving during rehearsals or games that you used to have must all be improved-- taken to a higher level. You can either rise to those occasions, improve your range, polish your etiquette, & vamp up your Cougar enthusiasm, or you can buckle under the pressure & refuse to grow. No one can force you to be a better person or a better trombonist; no one can change your connection with God, save you. Yes, other people can influence your desire to come closer to God, through their testimonies & their positive outlook on life; & people can influence your desire to become a better trombonist by the purity of their tone, their superior sight-reading skills, or their overall commitment to this wonderful instrument.

"I had an econ professor at Mt. SAC that said that the payoff you get from something should be directly proportionate to the amount of work you put into it. Basic economics, or thereabouts. Makes sense; it's a 'reap what you sow' policy. I've seen this in many of the day-to-day transactions & personal relations. If you study well & do the homework you'll learn the material, & if you skive off & daydream then you'll be hard pressed to come out with anything worth value. Same kind of thing with friends--- if you take the time to spend time with them then you'll have a stronger connection that isn't possible without it. However, I don't think this quite applies to the 2 main relationships stated before. When you take the time to know, serve, & love God, He will bless your life so much more than the efforts you put in (Mosiah 2:21--... I say, if ye should serve him with all your whole souls yet ye would be unprofitable servants.). With the trombone, I've found that the returns to practicing and playing have increased exponentially. Even a little bit of daily practice & such is met with the wonderful associations that you only get when you're one of the bones. For me, at least, just being able to share in my musical pursuits with others and rejoicing in really neat trombone arrangements is more than I can ever really repay.

"This goes out to every trombonist that I've ever had the good fortune to play with. You'll never really know just how much I've valued a duet or ensemble moment played along side you. & also, to Philip & Dusty, who have stayed with me loyally & are always reminding me what it means, in their own symbolic way, of how to draw closer to God. Thank you."