"I cannot introduce a topic,

...because how do I know what will interest you? Ask me questions, and I will do my best to answer them." Charlotte Bronte, Jane Eyre

So, my roommate Nic told me the other day that she likes how I start all of my stories as if I've already been talking to you for about an hour... Which I guess is true, because I usually can't stand small talk. I enjoy talking about random things, but so help me if I have to ask yet another person where they're from, what their major is, & when they're graduating. Don't get me wrong-- it's not like I don't want to know those things, but how can you possibly glean much of a person's character if they're giving you the same 2 minute spiel that they've rehearsed since their first time at a BYU singles' ward fhe? & it's also slightly annoying from the standpoint of being asked those questions-- if someone asks me my major, there's only so many questions that you can take from there, especially if my interrogator thinks that math is hard/they could never understand econ/oh, you must like money & business... kind of deal. I guess I can see some interest in trying to determine what kind of cultural upbringing you have, so maybe asking the person's city/state (not city-state, which makes me think of ancient Rome for some reason...) has some merit in defining the social language of a person, but somehow I doubt that's why people ask it. Usually they want to make ties in their mind between people that they already know, even if you don't know them, because if you live *close* to the other person then you might somehow be like them... Or not.

Alright, it's hard to figure out what to say at first, so you revert to those cursed, standard, survey-filler-control questions/variables. Luckily, you can usually tell gender at first glance, or that'd make for some awkward moments. Just don't go there. Still, you can have a list of things that you'd like to know, or have just been thinking about in general, & use those to facilitate conversation. I like to ask people which Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle is their favourite. It doesn't matter if you like the same one as me, or even if you have a favourite. You don't even need to remember them all, but at least it can get you thinking back to your childhood & watching cartoons/playing with action figures with the other kids on the block. Plus, those villains were something else, weren't they? I mean, there was that pig guy with the mo-hawk, & the Brain, & all those ninjas that followed Shredder... Classic. I once had an interesting first date dinner conversation about the death penalty (disclaimer: try not to bring up political topics unless you feel that both of you will be able to handle differences in opinions without getting awkward).... The point is, if you talk about something that's somewhat mundane, then you're not likely to remember the person's name very well... talk about something that doesn't deal with either of you directly, yet you can both relate to on a random level, & the experience will be so much nicer. In my opinion. Obviously.

I remember rather enjoying Jane Eyre when my visiting teacher recommended it to me in December of '05. However, as I look back on what I romanticized out of it as a younger woman, I realize that Jane still had a bit of growing up to do. Granted, there wasn't that much for a woman to do in that time period, but still... What is wrong with a lady introducing a topic-- so what if the man doesn't find it interesting? You can't expect anyone to pull the full weight of any conversation; that just makes things tiresome/tedious. I consider myself to be a shy girl. Sometimes, I just can't seem to find words in English to describe my thoughts, or I'm too intimidated by the awesomeness of my peers to instigate something interesting. It's all a big shame, really, & I've decided to take the advice of someone awesome & get rid of my shame. No one will bite my head off for me trying to talk to them. There are so many people that I want to get to know better, that I need to stop having this Jane mentality of waiting for them to ask me a question, & simply go forth & start the dialogue. I'm graduating in December-- what am I waiting for?!

Hey, who's your favourite Ninja Turtle...?